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Ask FreeloveMD Archive » Why Can’t I Commit To One Person?

Why Can’t I Commit To One Person?

Ask FreeloveMD | July 22, 2008

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Why can’t I commit to one person? I’m a 37 year old female, was married once for almost 5 years and we have a son who is now 6 and lives with me full-time. I found myself bored in my marriage and got out. I have been dating someone for the past 3 1/2 years and now I want out, I’m bored again. Looking back I seem to always get bored after being one person for some time. My boyfriend now wants to get married and at one point I did say yes but now I don’t want too. I’m afraid it’s going to be the same disaster as with my ex. I have decided I don’t want to be married, live with him or have him hanging around me 24/7. He’s great but I just can’t do it with him or anyone else. I don’t know what to do. My parents have been married for 39 years and got married after dating for only 2 months. So what’s my problem? Besides being TOO independent. I feel I can’t commit and never will be able too. The thought of being with one person forever makes my head spin. But why? I try, I get bored easily no matter what. This guy wants to give me everything and I won’t have to work (but I will) and I can’t accept that. What is wrong with me???

Nothing is wrong with you. You’re just not cut out to be married or tied down. That’s just who you are. Accept who you are and move on with your life. If boyfriends are unable to accept you and want to get married etc. then end the relationship. You’ve tried the marriage/commitment route and it’s not for you. Maybe you’ll change as time goes by, maybe you won’t. The only issue is that people in general are looking for some kind of long term commitment when they get involved with somebody. For that reason it may get harder and harder for you to find relationships, at least ones with any substance. So expect that.

This question was answered by Joe, a love expert and FreeloveMD contributor.

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