Talking With Her Ex-Boyfriend
Ask FreeloveMD | August 20, 2007
3 Comments
A friend and I recently started talking about getting together. She has just removed herself from a bad relationship. She complained to me about how her ex-boyfriend made her feel like dirt. The weird thing is she still wants to talk to him. She even told me that if we get serious she doesn’t want to stop talking to him. She says he has become a very good friend. I am concerned because she has left her ex-boyfriend before and dated another man, and eventually went back to her ex-boyfriend. Am I being insecure?
No you are not being insecure. You are being realistic. She has shown a pattern of using men as a placeholder for her ex-boyfriend. Nobody wants or deserves to be a placeholder.
If he makes her feel like dirt she should want to distance herself from him instead of keeping him close. Communicating with her verbally abusive ex-boyfriend should be off limits if she wants to date you. She obviously feels there is a chance of them getting back together, and that is why she wants to keep lines of communication open.
D says:
October 6, 2007 at 9:12 pm
No you are not. Look, There is no problem with being worried about your friend. I think you should sit with your friend and tell her how you feel and that what she is doing can lead to heartbreak again.
Lee says:
January 5, 2008 at 3:34 pm
Some woman just don’t know what’s good for them. Especially if the they came out of an abusive relationship. They’re always drawn back. I say go with your heart. If your heart says to leave… Leave, only you know
Dee T says:
January 25, 2008 at 12:12 am
I definitely agree with the advice given. I’ve been in the same situation-I felt like I was a rebound and someone on the “backburner”. i was consistantly compared to other women and my ex often brought up his ex’s name around me-even keeping in touch with her family. He still had feelings for her and he was using me (I guess) to get back at her. Alot of people suggest that if your mate has a bad track record with relationships-DON’T Date him or her. My ex is married now, but he still tries to keep in touch with my family and was with me until I told him to stop communicating. A leopard usually doesn’t change its spots, so my advice to you would be to leave or she will continue to disrespect you. You deserve better!!!