Comments on: My Fiance Is Not Affectionate http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/ Get Free Relationship Advice. Thu, 09 Sep 2010 12:25:41 +0000 hourly 1 By: kim http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-43583 kim Sun, 18 Jul 2010 07:19:42 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-43583 At least u are getting sex. been married 2 years and my husband has never made love to me. he has ED now, and I tell him a passionate kiss would be nice, but he refuses. the rest of our relashionship is great. I dream about what it would be like but he won't touch me. I only get an ocassional hug and quick kiss. he says he has been there and done that and dosen't care if he has sex ever. I can't help but wonder if he loves me as much as I thought because my needs are not important to him. I know for a fact he is not chating, I desire him so much that I am starting to get depressed and I am afraid the strain will ruin our relashionship. I am very much in love with him and I am pretty sure he feels the same. I don't understand and I am hurt beyond words At least u are getting sex. been married 2 years and my husband has never made love to me. he has ED now, and I tell him a passionate kiss would be nice, but he refuses. the rest of our relashionship is great. I dream about what it would be like but he won’t touch me. I only get an ocassional hug and quick kiss. he says he has been there and done that and dosen’t care if he has sex ever. I can’t help but wonder if he loves me as much as I thought because my needs are not important to him. I know for a fact he is not chating, I desire him so much that I am starting to get depressed and I am afraid the strain will ruin our relashionship. I am very much in love with him and I am pretty sure he feels the same. I don’t understand and I am hurt beyond words

]]> By: tina http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-12871 tina Fri, 05 Feb 2010 05:52:10 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-12871 well i have been with my fiance for about 7 years and am trying my hardest to learn how to deal with his non affectionate ways sometimes i think mayb im just being to needy because he does give me affection but i dont think it is enough am i just being ungrateful. well i have been with my fiance for about 7 years and am trying my hardest to learn how to deal with his non affectionate ways sometimes i think mayb im just being to needy because he does give me affection but i dont think it is enough am i just being ungrateful.

]]> By: mee http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-11858 mee Sun, 29 Nov 2009 18:02:19 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-11858 ny fiance never show me much of anything except anger. she is an alcolholic but has stoped for 6 months now i do everything for her ans she does very little for me sex is even aan issuesits always something tthe problem i have is i do love her but now i just want to smack the hell out of her and get her to think mnormal. she is 47 and has ansieety problem depression but i think is just an excuse now can you help ny fiance never show me much of anything except anger. she is an alcolholic but has stoped for 6 months now i do everything for her ans she does very little for me sex is even aan issuesits always something tthe problem i have is i do love her but now i just want to smack the hell out of her and get her to think mnormal. she is 47 and has ansieety problem depression but i think is just an excuse now can you help

]]> By: agree with pat http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-11382 agree with pat Sat, 10 Oct 2009 14:34:12 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-11382 I agree with Pat - and I need to find a woman like some of you gals! I have been married a long time and my wife is very unaffectionate - which I completely do not understand. She shows no interest in me at all except to criticize what I do or fail to do. Over time this has destroyed my self-esteem - after all if im not worth it to her who should I expect to be valuable to and loved by? My advice is you better REALLY love the person to stay involved with them becasue the will NOT change. You will be making the sacrifice so you better think its worth it! I agree with Pat – and I need to find a woman like some of you gals! I have been married a long time and my wife is very unaffectionate – which I completely do not understand. She shows no interest in me at all except to criticize what I do or fail to do. Over time this has destroyed my self-esteem – after all if im not worth it to her who should I expect to be valuable to and loved by? My advice is you better REALLY love the person to stay involved with them becasue the will NOT change. You will be making the sacrifice so you better think its worth it!

]]> By: Pat http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-10621 Pat Wed, 15 Jul 2009 22:52:36 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-10621 I am one of these guys who shares the side of the women on this one. I have been with my fiancee for almost 3.5 years and we even have a son together. I have been doing everything I can think of to get some kind of emotional feedback from her. Anything sexual is up to me to initiate. Sex is more of a control thing for her. Planning things for us to do is tough because she would prefer to sleep then to do most anything with me or anyone. The only time I have gotten any real emotion is when she thought there was a chance of losing me. I think the real reason anyone tolerates this is because the upside of this relationship is so amazing. I love my fiancee more then anything in the world and she is amazing, funny, smart and beautiful. I just wish I would be allowed to know her thoughts and feelings instead of guessing at everything. I am one of these guys who shares the side of the women on this one. I have been with my fiancee for almost 3.5 years and we even have a son together. I have been doing everything I can think of to get some kind of emotional feedback from her. Anything sexual is up to me to initiate. Sex is more of a control thing for her. Planning things for us to do is tough because she would prefer to sleep then to do most anything with me or anyone. The only time I have gotten any real emotion is when she thought there was a chance of losing me.

I think the real reason anyone tolerates this is because the upside of this relationship is so amazing. I love my fiancee more then anything in the world and she is amazing, funny, smart and beautiful. I just wish I would be allowed to know her thoughts and feelings instead of guessing at everything.

]]> By: Sara http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-10314 Sara Fri, 12 Jun 2009 14:28:27 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-10314 I recently broke up with my boyfriend who also was not affectionate. We have been going out for a year and 2 months and throughout the relationship I've been practically begging him to show me some kind of emotion that shows me he cares. He did try to change but he reverted back to his unaffectionate self. He doesn't even compliment me when he sees that I look like nice. He's never even told me he loves me. I decided that I couldn't take it anymore. I would rather be single. I felt like when I was with him my emotions were set on high, but when he didn't hug me, kiss me passionately, or compliment me, they would hit an all time low. I say you either have him go see a psychiatrist, to work things out because all this stems from his childhood, and him not being loved, or consider finding someone else. I know its harsh but after reading comments online about women who have been married to an unaffectionate man their stories just makes a woman want to cry. I say you take a long look in the mirror and decided if you want to live the rest of your life with an unaffectionate man, a person who can't give you the love and affection that you so truly desire. I recently broke up with my boyfriend who also was not affectionate. We have been going out for a year and 2 months and throughout the relationship I’ve been practically begging him to show me some kind of emotion that shows me he cares. He did try to change but he reverted back to his unaffectionate self. He doesn’t even compliment me when he sees that I look like nice. He’s never even told me he loves me. I decided that I couldn’t take it anymore. I would rather be single. I felt like when I was with him my emotions were set on high, but when he didn’t hug me, kiss me passionately, or compliment me, they would hit an all time low. I say you either have him go see a psychiatrist, to work things out because all this stems from his childhood, and him not being loved, or consider finding someone else. I know its harsh but after reading comments online about women who have been married to an unaffectionate man their stories just makes a woman want to cry. I say you take a long look in the mirror and decided if you want to live the rest of your life with an unaffectionate man, a person who can’t give you the love and affection that you so truly desire.

]]> By: Marie http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-10012 Marie Thu, 30 Apr 2009 14:47:47 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-10012 It is a very confusing situation Joe and hard to understand. No, a person shouldnt need to be hugged continuously to feel loved. But upon waking and greeting, and byes, a hug and kiss mean a lot to naturally affectionate people. If my man didnt hug and kiss, and hold me in his arms at night for just a few minutes, I would be very upset. I do think I am more chemically attracted to him than he is to me, but nevertheless, he does many things for me that make me know he has a high level of caring. I do think that some males are rather negligent and somewhat selfish in taking care of their own sexual needs, rather than their partner, but they are cheating themselves and her. If you love someone, you put their needs uppermost, thus enhancing the feelings she has for him, and creating much more happiness for himself. It feels humiliating for a woman to have to tell a man that they should make an effort to satisfy her, as she feels that if he really loved, he would want to. Women respond to affection . And a woman should show her man how much she really cares by the extra thoughtful things she does for him too. It's a two way street that takes mutual attraction and real love and committment. This is a deep subject. It is a very confusing situation Joe and hard to understand. No, a person shouldnt need to be hugged continuously to feel loved. But upon waking and greeting, and byes, a hug and kiss mean a lot to naturally affectionate people. If my man didnt hug and kiss, and hold me in his arms at night for just a few minutes, I would be very upset. I do think I am more chemically attracted to him than he is to me, but nevertheless, he does many things for me that make me know he has a high level of caring. I do think that some males are rather negligent and somewhat selfish in taking care of their own sexual needs, rather than their partner, but they are cheating themselves and her. If you love someone, you put their needs uppermost, thus enhancing the feelings she has for him, and creating much more happiness for himself. It feels humiliating for a woman to have to tell a man that they should make an effort to satisfy her, as she feels that if he really loved, he would want to. Women respond to affection . And a woman should show her man how much she really cares by the extra thoughtful things she does for him too. It’s a two way street that takes mutual attraction and real love and committment. This is a deep subject.

]]> By: joe http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-9457 joe Mon, 16 Mar 2009 04:23:50 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-9457 I'm one of those guys, Its horrible, and almost ruining our marriage. My Wife is sick a lot and I feel its my fault. I never had affection as a kid and I treet my Wife the same way. I try, I say I love you all the time, and mean it ( a few times a day) and try to hug too. But it feels so fake to me, and to her. We are really sad but I'm trying. Were both sensative but I feel its kinda pathetic that someone needs to be told (or hugged) all the time to know that they are loved. I gave my wife an out, but she says she still loves me. It also causes a lot of other fights between us too. It really sucks and I wish I were different. any advice would be great. I’m one of those guys, Its horrible, and almost ruining our marriage. My Wife is sick a lot and I feel its my fault. I never had affection as a kid and I treet my Wife the same way. I try, I say I love you all the time, and mean it ( a few times a day) and try to hug too. But it feels so fake to me, and to her. We are really sad but I’m trying. Were both sensative but I feel its kinda pathetic that someone needs to be told (or hugged) all the time to know that they are loved. I gave my wife an out, but she says she still loves me. It also causes a lot of other fights between us too. It really sucks and I wish I were different. any advice would be great.

]]> By: Bubbles http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-8299 Bubbles Tue, 11 Nov 2008 20:44:11 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-8299 I know how you feel. I am almost 5yrs with my boyfriend and we are now living together. I feel lonely every day of my life... and un-loved. It breaks you down, bit by bit. I am tired of being the lap-dog and always having to ask if I want any contact. He should want to do this for himself, right? Are these the actions of someone in love? If he doesn't want me why does he continue to plan our future together? I used to be such a cheerful person but this really wears me down. I'm sorry I have no advice for you but I can offer my understanding. You're not alone. I know how you feel. I am almost 5yrs with my boyfriend and we are now living together. I feel lonely every day of my life… and un-loved. It breaks you down, bit by bit. I am tired of being the lap-dog and always having to ask if I want any contact. He should want to do this for himself, right? Are these the actions of someone in love? If he doesn’t want me why does he continue to plan our future together? I used to be such a cheerful person but this really wears me down. I’m sorry I have no advice for you but I can offer my understanding. You’re not alone.

]]> By: Bubbles http://www.freelovemd.com/ask-lovemd/my-fiance-is-not-affectionate/comment-page-1/#comment-8298 Bubbles Tue, 11 Nov 2008 20:41:04 +0000 http://www.freelovemd.com/?p=419#comment-8298 I know how you feel. I am almost 5yrs with my bayfriend and we are now living together. I feel lonely every day of my life... and un-loved. It breaks you down, bit by bit. I am tired of being the lap-dog and alway having to ask if I want any contact. He should want to do this for himself, right? Are these the actions of someone in love? If he doesn't want me why does he continue to plan our future together? I used to be such a cheerful person but this really wears me down. I know how you feel. I am almost 5yrs with my bayfriend and we are now living together. I feel lonely every day of my life… and un-loved. It breaks you down, bit by bit. I am tired of being the lap-dog and alway having to ask if I want any contact. He should want to do this for himself, right? Are these the actions of someone in love? If he doesn’t want me why does he continue to plan our future together? I used to be such a cheerful person but this really wears me down.

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