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Ask FreeloveMD Archive » I Am Tired Of Helping His Brother

I Am Tired Of Helping His Brother

Ask FreeloveMD | August 25, 2008

1 Comment

I am tired of helping his brother! My partner’s brother is already 40 and still has no “real” job or place to live. Last year, we offered to help him, he lived with us for a year, providing him everything he needed(even money sometimes). But then he lied to us a couple of times, promised us things that never happened, and still got in some trouble, so we asked him to move out. Now he is in trouble again and my partner is trying to convince me to let him stay with us again! Of course I don’t want him to because I feel he is old enough to support himself , we have already helped him enough and I don’t want to be involved in his problems any more. My partner keeps making me feel guilty though. What should I do?

Everyone feels differently about how much they should help their “fellow man” be it a relative or not. Your partner obviously feels differently than you probably because it’s his brother. However, you need to frame your relationship first with your partner and then compromise the amount of help etc. you give his brother. If it doesn’t affect your relationship let it go. If it does then address it as unemotionally as possible.

This question was answered by Joe, a love expert and FreeloveMD contributor.

1 Comment So Far

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  • Casey says:
    August 26, 2008 at 5:04 pm

    I honestly think you should be totally on board with your man. It is really hard to turn your back on your brother. I know this first hand. When my brother got out of the war some years ago. Him, his wife and children didn’t really have enough money to live on thier own. At first it was great to have the whole family together- that shortly turned into too much of a stressful scene.

    Maybe this time you and your man should be on the complet same page before you make any decisions. If you chose to let him stay….make stipulations for a healthy productive SHORT-TEARM enviroment.

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