Comments on: Husband’s Woman Friend

By: bstuart

bstuart — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 15:15:26 +0000

My advice to all of you –if you think something is going on-it is!! Nature gives you that sense–pay attention to it. You ignore it at your own peril. Get a plan together now. Figure out what you will do if your suspicions are correct. Don’t wait for the sky to fall on your head!
I’ve been there, done that. I didn’t pay attention and I paid dearly for it!!! It’s all about their egos, and their constant need for attention, flattery, and the feel great boost that they get from it. It’s a sign of emotional immaturity on their part, and it will destroy you if you don’t act! The best thing is to plan for your own welfare, and future. These inconsiderate and self absorbed cheaters are not worth the trouble they cause for their partners.
I speak the truth that only experience can reveal!

By: MS

MS — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 20:56:00 +0000

I should also add that even though they do not work on the same shift anymore, they still text and email everyday. He never, ever, texts or emails me unless he needs something. But it’s never just to say hi, or ask about my day. She gets all that kind of attn.

By: MS

MS — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 20:50:56 +0000

I vocalized my concerns about my husband’s close female coworker/friend. I was kindly but firmly told by him to deal with it. That they weren’t doing anything wrong (even though they text and email constantly.) They currently do not work the same shift anymore, but when they did, they carpooled, spent their lunch breaks together, went out for beers together after work, and texted and emailed all the time. It is something I struggle with on a daily basis. Because it’s a friendship that continues to grow, despite me telling my husband how much it hurts. But because he feels he’s not in the wrong, he refuses to end the friendship, which makes it impossible for me to get past, or forgive him. He feels I should trust him. Hard to trust him when he devoted more time to this friendship than he does to our marriage, and hard to trust him when he his the texts, emails, and their going out for beers from me because he thought it would upset me. Like I said it’s a daily struggle. And to top it all off, I have met this woman, once, and she and I can’t stand each other. But, hubby doesn’t seem to mind her disrespecting me or our marriage, just as long as he gets to have his buddy.

By: khalil

khalil — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 18:39:33 +0000

انا خليل احب ان يكون لدي صديقات من اجل زلك توجهت ال موكع صديقات

By: Renee

Renee — Sat, 08 Aug 2009 17:28:40 +0000

I’ve been with my husband since high school so 16 years now but we’ve only been married for the last 3 and for the first 12 years I never had doubts about his loyalty and I trusted him 100% because he never gave me any reason to not. I always felt like I was so lucky that I had a solid relationship and that I didn’t have to worry about him cheating on me. I knew he loved me and I thought we were meant for eachother UNTIL…..about 2 years ago I was doing his laundry and I happen to feel something in one of his pockets. It felt like a stack of paper so I pulled it out and there standing in the laundry room I almost feel to the floor. He wrote 2 letters about my sister. They were as detailed as I’ve ever read anything. He said he would love to make love with her for hours, make her cum, and so on and on. He said he hopes no one finds out and that he want to make her feel real good. I almost died. Literally. My whole world turned up side down and after 12 years of walking on clouds and feeling so lucky, it was shattered. There were 2 different letters. He never gave them to her, it just like he was thinking these things and just had to write them down or something. I didn’t know what to do at that point. The ironic thing, it was Easter Day and I had 40 people on the way to my house for an Easter dinner. His family by the way. So I called him into our bedroom and I must of been as white as a ghost because he knew something was up the minute I called him in. I pulled them out and he then turned white. He didn’t know what to say. I mean really, what do you say when you write down that you want to satisfy your sister-in-law in every way. He talked about things and I told him we would need therapy and I told him he changed me. I will never took at him the same way again. I felt ashamed, hurt, scared, mad, emmbarrested, humiliated, I just didn’t understand. This came out left field. So of course like most women, I started to self reflect, is it me. What did I do? What didn’t I do? What’s wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough? Why my sister? And so on, I just didn’t understand this. I thought I knew him. And the hardest part of this whole thing for me is, I am a very confident woman and I am the type to never change for a man or anyone else and there I sat wondering what I need to do to fix this. That’s where anger came in, why the fuck should I have to change when I didn’t do anything wrong. He pulled everything that I thought we had right from under me and I didn’t even see it coming. And the answer I got was, we weren’t having sex very much (during a usual marriage dry spell) and one day my sister came over to go swimming and she looked good to him. What the hell? I did the only thing I knew to do was to try to rebuild this relationship since it was an isolated instance. We talked and seemed to have gotten closer and we moved on. We never did go to therapy, I guess I figured it never went anywhere and it only happened once I think we’ll be o.k. Now, I still feel weird when my sister’s over. She doesn’t know anything but I just feel a bit of tension in the room if my sister and my husband are in the same room. So 2 years later, our relationship is going ok but I do to this day think about those damn letters at least once a week. I just can’t help it. I don’t tell him that but the pain and anger and shame I still feel is there. I mean, what’s wrong with me. I carry that around with me all the time. Again, he doesn’t know this but the hurt and pain and dishonesty is still there. So, I get home yesterday and get on my computer and just happen to look in the internet history page and what do I see, him searching for one of his friends’s ex-girlfriend. Oh my god, why???? So before I over reacted I ask him, calmly and with no tone because then he would think something’s up, why were you looking for XXX and isn’t that Henry’s ex-girlfriend? He said, no I was searching for something for my sister. There was something about his tone that just didn’t sit well with me. We went to dinner and when we got home I started searching around and what did I find, a picture of Henry’s ex-girlfriend and what’s her name, XXX. I was so mad. When this girl was around (about 5 years ago) I didn’t like her much. I mean she was nice but I didn’t like the way my husband seemed really nice to her. Something about the way he was to her bothered me. I can’t explain why, let’s just say it’s a wife’s gut feeling. She moved away and we never heard from her, great I say!!! After 20 minutes of me asking him point blank, were you looking up Henry’s ex-girlfriend XXX, he said no 40 times. No, no, and no. Then I walked over to the computer and opened the picture I found (it was just her on facebook), he said I was looking her up, I was looking for someone named XXX for my sister. So I said, her sister’s friend is the EXACT same name as Henry’s ex. Are you going to sit here and lie to my face. That’s when his body changed and he got up and said he didn’t want to talk to me. I knew I hit something. He sat up there and lied 40 times to my face and I pretty much begged him to not lie and he still did. After 2 hours of talking, I realize we weren’t getting anywhere so I went to bed.

Now, after all that I do have a question to put out there. What if your husband thinks about other women? Never has done anything but just thinking about them. I mean, do you think it’s wrong for him to write about it and search for someone else? I know I can’t control who he thinks about but once he writes about it and searches on the internet, it kind of becomes real. That’s the 1st step. I am so mad inside. I am so hurt. I can’t look at him the same way. He’s a lier if nothing else. Yes, he hasn’t cheated but he broke me so bad that he mine as well had. What do I do at this point? I’m just so confused. We’ve been together so long and I thought we were ment to be and now I just don’t know. Why is he doing this? Should I be thinking, what’s wrong with me or not? I’m just so confused. And lastly, is a form of cheating??? It sure feels like it to me.

By: Angie

Angie — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 17:50:37 +0000

Well here is my story. Me and my husband have been married for 5 years. We have a son together, 3 yrs old and another son that he adopted from my prior marriage, 9 years old. We had a good relationship or so I thought. Right before my sons adopton was final I came across instant messages (really bad ones)that he had been writing to alot of different girls. They were messages like he was thinking of her while he was having sex with me,inviting her over to our house while my 3 yr old was asleep, etc. When I found out my whole world seemed to not exist. He told me his reasoning was he wanted to see if he still had it and I wasnt giving him enough sex. So, I tried to be what he wanted and then ex-girlfriends and other girls that he said were just friends he starts texting with on the cellphone. Just recently, I caught him texting a girl from our hometown that we had seen in a resturant a month ago. He said she too was just a friend and that he was just trying to find out why her and her ex got divorced. I asked him how he got her # and he said he got a friend at work to call her work to find out her cellphone #. I confronted her and she told me he had been calling her sexy, telling her times to call and not to call and that he wanted to kiss her so he could get closure. He was also into internet pornography really bad. He says that it is normal to have girls that are friends and that I am too jealous and controling. I tell him that I dont like him to talking to other woman behind my back and he acts like he doesnt care. He shows me affection all the time and is really a good husband this is the only problem I have. Can anybody tell me what the hell is going on?

By: ahmad yousefzadeh

ahmad yousefzadeh — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 23:49:51 +0000

what is name of yourcity

By: ahmad yousefzadeh

ahmad yousefzadeh — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 23:47:50 +0000

where do you living

By: ahmad yousefzadeh

ahmad yousefzadeh — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 23:44:52 +0000

I prefer to speaking you now

By: ahmad yousefzadeh

ahmad yousefzadeh — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 23:41:42 +0000

I want to meet you