Ask Questions. Get Answers.

Need some relationship advice? We probably don't know everything about love, but we certaintly think we do. This is where we answer your love, relationship, and dating questions. You can also submit your question by completing the form to the right.

We gets lots and lots of questions every day, so don't get discouraged if we can't give you advice. If your question doesn't get answered, try asking for advice in the discussion forums. You will be sure to get advice on your relationship from the forum community.

Ask FreeloveMD Archive » How Do You Bring Up The Topic of Marriage?

How Do You Bring Up The Topic of Marriage?

Ask FreeloveMD | June 25, 2008

No Comments Yet

I am so worried, how do you bring up the topic of marriage without seeming crazy? My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years now. I’m 26 and he is 30. I feel like I’m ready to talk about getting married but I don’t know how to bring it up and talk to him about it without feeling stupid. I don’t want him to feel like I’m trying to pressure him because I’m not in a hurry at the moment. I just want to know that we are on the same page with things. We usually talk about everything and are very open and comfortable with each other but for some reason I feel scared to bring this topic up. I knew he was “the one” very early in the relationship but I have never wanted to get married any time soon until now. We both have discussed and agreed not to live together until marriage. I bought a house a year ago by myself and recently he just moved into another apartment because he said he didn’t want to buy a house and then have both of our houses to worry about selling if we get married. I froze and didn’t respond and he hasn’t brought up marriage at all since. How do I let him know I’m ready to talk about it now and how do I talk to him about it without playing the “pressure” crazy girlfriend?

It sounds like you both are on the same page about marriage, just that when it comes to timing and specifics you both don’t want to be the first to bring them up. You might address it in a similar fashion as your letter. Tell him that lately you’ve been thinking of the future and while you don’t want to get married in the next month or pressure him you’d like to have some kind of a long term plan. What about getting engaged? That usually is step one. Do you know his parents well, or do you know any close friends of his? Sometimes guys in particular need someone like a parent or a friend to give them a push. They might just ask him when is he going to get you an engagement ring. If there is no one to give him a push then you’ll have to do it yourself. Just be yourself and be open and honest. It sounds like you both want the same thing just that he doesn’t feel as urgent about it right now as you.

This question was answered by Joe, a love expert and FreeloveMD contributor.

Share Your Comment

Your email address will never be published. Inappropriate comments will be deleted.