Doesn’t Love His Girlfriend
Ask FreeloveMD | November 11, 2006
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I have a friend I’ve known for 5 years, we have a lot of fun together and get along really well. He has a girlfriend who I am friends with as well but lately my feelings for him have become deeper. I know that he’s not happy in his relationship, that he isn’t sure he loves this girl and he knows he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his life with her. He doesnt know my feelings. We have mutual friends who think we should be together and have told both of us, I would never come between him and his girlfriend but don’t know whether to wait until he ends the relationship with her of if I should just forget it and move on remaining friends? I’m worried that if I told him my feelings that this would make me come between them. We are the same age but his girlfriend is 13 years younger than him. Any advice?
It’s no fun to have a crush on someone who is already taken. The best course of action would be to wait for something to hopefully happen between him and his girlfriend. Wait a few months and see if anything happens.
If you really can’t take it anymore after a few months then it is OK to tell him how you feel. You want to be clear, you are letting him know you have feelings for him, but you don’t expect anything right now because he is in a relationship. It doesn’t have to be a big production, just tell him straight away that you have feelings for him, but have no intentions of it going any further than that while he is in a relationship. You completely respect his relationship with his girlfriend, you just have to tell him how you feel. Then it becomes his choice.